CHAPTER FROM THE BOOK ‘BEYOND CRISTIANO’
Freedom Behind the Bars
The Smile That Heals
“It was always about football for Ronaldinho,” said Edo, watching the crowd pour into the ground. “It was never about the club’s badge nor some big achievements. That’s why his game was absolute. In Grêmio, Brazil, where he started — and later in Paris, it was always the same — pure football, pure joy. Then he transferred to Barcelona, and the game of football changed forever. Ronaldinho added a new dimension to the game — the Ronaldinho dimension. We had never seen anything like it. His first game at Camp Nou unveiled everything Barcelona fans needed to know about the new magician in town. The goal he scored against Sevilla on his home debut was poetry.”
“Yes!” said David excitedly. “It’s crazy that it was his first goal for Barcelona!”
“Absolutely,” said Edo. “Ronaldinho received the ball in his own half, took on one player, then nutmegged another before freeing himself in space for a shot. And what a shot it was! He struck the ball from maybe thirty meters as hard as possible, and it went in off the crossbar. It was the most delicious way to present himself to the Barca home fans.”
“Yep,” said David, laughing with joy. “Frank Rijkaard grabbed his head as if he couldn’t believe what kind of player he’d brought to the club.”
“That’s right,” said Edo. “It was as if he knew he had brought in a player who would soon receive the Ballon d’Or.”
Edo paused briefly to glance at the United Trinity sculpture, made in honour of the Manchester United legends.
“Ronaldinho became immortal,” he continued. “Two seasons later, he dragged Barcelona to the final of the Champions League in Paris, where they beat Arsenal in an epic showdown.”
“What a game,” said David.
“He was crowned the best player in the world,” said Edo. “But essentially, nothing changed. He was absolute.”
“Wouldn’t he be more absolute if he stayed in Barcelona and won five more Ballon d’Ors?” said David.
Edo shook his head.
“That’s the thing, David,” he said. “Ronaldinho didn’t need to stay in Barca and prove anything to anybody. His game was proof in itself beyond any rational understanding. Later, he went to Milan, back to Brazil in Flamengo and Atlético Mineiro, and then to Mexico, where he played for Querétaro. Wherever he played, it was all about playing the game’s purest form. Ronaldinho didn’t have colours, and he didn’t have enemies. He didn’t identify with the badge. He wasn’t Barcelona, nor Milan or Flamengo.”
“Yeah, and that’s why he couldn’t fit into many teams,” David said. “After all, some of the greatest managers couldn’t find him a place in the squad.”
“For God’s sake,” Edo said. “Even when he ended up imprisoned in a Paraguayan prison after entering the country with a fake passport, nothing changed. With the same passion he was nutmegging Gennaro Gattuso and Sergio Ramos fifteen years earlier, he was now nutmegging serial killers in the prison courtyard with the same smile on his face and the same no-look pass on his boot. As I said, he is football.”
“Why would he fake passports?” said David. “And why would he have unpaid taxes and swing guns around in pictures if he was so pure as you claim?”
“I don’t know,” said Edo. “Even the purest ones do crazy shit, David. But that smile he brings with him transcends all those crazy things, shining a new light on them. Life puts you in unexpected situations and makes you do unexpected things. But when you do crazy shit with love, it’s different. According to reports, Ronaldinho was in good spirits despite being jailed. So he could share his energy with his cell mates who needed positivity and love.”
“Why would they need love?” said David. “They’re in prison for a reason!”
“Yes, they are there for a reason,” said Edo. “And the essential reason is because they lack love or carry some profound trauma. You can only hurt others if you are hurt yourself, man.”
“Are you sure about that?” said David.
Edo looked up at the sky and then back to the crowd.
“Ronaldinho was there to give love, David,” said Edo. “He was there to share smiles, show them love, and help them love themselves, as Ronaldinho loves himself — football — life. I mean, still, he wiped the floor with them, let’s take nothing away from that. Apparently, he scored five goals and assisted six in an 11–2 victory for his side — all with the same smile.”
“The same smile eh?” said David.
“Yep,” said Edo. “That’s what genuine freedom is. Outside needs and wants do not drive it. It is driven by realising you are already complete, and by simply playing the game of football. It’s when you can rely on your intuition and the higher intelligence which is so different to the basic intelligence the mind uses.”
“What if he was simply more talented than others?” said David. “What about that, my friend?”
“Well, that’s difficult to deny,” said Edo. “But Ronaldinho explained quite nicely that his game was based on improvisation because, as a forward, he didn’t have time to overthink. You have a second, rarely more, to decide whether to dribble, shoot, or pass to the right or left. It is instinct that gives the orders.”
“How can that kind of freedom be achieved?” David asked.
“By not identifying with form,” said Edo. “By not believing you are Barcelona, you are the Ballon d’Or winner or the prisoner — by not believing you are the best, or the worst. They’re all physical forms and thoughts for the ego to attach to and make part of your identity. But those are just ideas — mind-created concepts. Yes, he is all of that, but on the surface only. Essentially, he is free of those mind-created concepts. And if something is mind-created, we are again in the egoic realm where good doesn’t exist without bad. Whenever you identify with something, that something inevitably creates suffering.”
David stood wide-eyed, looking at the crowd.
“So you claim Ronaldinho didn’t suffer in prison?” he said.
“Look, David,” said Edo. “Ronaldinho’s state of consciousness is beyond good and bad, which can liberate you even if you are behind bars. True peace is the result of that state of consciousness.”
“But he was still the prisoner. You can’t deny that fact.”
“No, he was in the prison. He wasn’t the prisoner. Just as he was playing for Barcelona. He wasn’t Barcelona. Just as he won the title of best player in the world. He was not the best player in the world. His mind was free from identification, and therefore he was free.”
“How can somebody not suffer while in prison?” David said. “I don’t think that’s possible, Edo.”
“It’s possible if you see it for what it is rather than identifying with the situation,” Edo said. “And more importantly, if you don’t identify with your thoughts about a certain situation — that’s the challenging part.”
“What thoughts?” said David.
“Well,” said Edo. “I’m talking about the thoughts that arise when you are in a difficult situation. For instance, thoughts that say things like I am screwed. If you identify with those thoughts, then you become those thoughts. You become screwed. The key is to recognise thoughts as they arise. That’s when they lose their power over you. The same applies to the emotions created by those thoughts.”
“What emotions?” said David.
Edo found an old chewing gum wrapper in his pocket and toyed with it while still staring at the crowds from a distance.
“Emotions of anxiety, stress, depression and so on,” he said. “If you can recognise them as they arise, the de-identification process begins, David. And you don’t become those emotions. They lose their power over you. You are still absolute Ronaldinho despite dark clouds in your inner sky. But once they dissipate, the sun is still there, shining. Ronaldinho’s smile is still shining, regardless of loss or victory!”
“Right,” said David, smiling at the sky.
Edo paused momentarily, listening to the chants get quieter as the fans moved inside Old Trafford. Finally, he spoke.
“That’s what makes you free even amid the most horrific terror or, in what you might see as the most horrible situation,” he said. “Ultimately, Ronaldinho wasn’t even a prisoner. He just was. And he happened to be in prison.”
“So what’s the point you are trying to make?” said David curiously. “To accept any situation as it is?”
“That’s another way of saying it,” said Edo. “To accept any situation as it is — to let it be. That’s what freedom is.”
Smoke from a nearby flare surrounded them, and Edo coughed a little.
“But the main thing is,” he said through his coughs. “You need to accept your thoughts about the situation. Thoughts make a situation good or bad, David. When you accept your thoughts, the moment they arise, you distance yourself from them. You see them clearly, and you step out of the realm of good and bad. You step into the realm of Ronaldinho. And suddenly, it’s alright.”
“Don’t you think that’s a way of giving in and becoming indifferent to life?” said David.
“Ego mistakes indifference for acceptance,” said Edo. “There’s a completely different energy about acceptance. Acceptance shows you the way, while indifference makes you numb. Only when you accept the situation as it is — only in that state of mind — can true and profound changes occur — the kind of change that starts from within.”
If that sounds interesting, here you can buy the book ‘Beyond Cristiano’ and read the rest of the chapters.
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